Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Would I be saved if I were brave?

I've got approximately umpteen-billion songs on my iPod, and Shawn Colvin's "If I Were Brave" just came on. Haven't listened to it in ages, and like so many other songs on the ol' iPod, I've forgotten about how wonderful the song is. It's one of those songs that is a pretty perfect package for me--the music and the lyrics are both simply awesome.
It was never clear what would come next,
But that's the risk and that's the test.
And you were the only one so far to follow.
No one talks about when one might stop and need to rest,
Or how long you sit alone before you stop looking back.
It's like you're waiting for Godot,
and then you pick your sorry ass up off the street,
And go.

There have been plenty of times in my life when I could't capture what I felt and put it into words. In these moments, when emotions swim and swirl--almost to the point of my drowning--I connect with music, and I find in music what I cannot find the words to say.

This song came out during my freshmen year of college, and I really connected with it then. I find myself connecting with it today, though in different ways that--no surprise to me--I cannot explain.

And, it makes me sad, knowing that there's music out there I connect with so deeply and that people I love can't always follow those connections. Or that people I love don't have that kind of relationship with music. I think this is one of the reasons Heinous and I really connected in grad school and have stayed such good friends; she gets this.

Thanks, Heinous.

1 comment:

J said...

Music is so infinitely important to me too. No one in these parts seems to feel it like I do, either.